shit i need and want to have done before or by the time i hit 25 next year.

- I want to be out of here. i already know where im headed unless i have reason to go elsewhere. ain’t tellin yall where though.

- i will find a job in the medical field again before i move there though.

- i want a house. but if im still single… i’ll just townhouse or condo it up. duplex, sumn… the house isn’t that high on my list

- i would like to NOT be single *coughiknowwhatiwastoldnottodobutsowhatitspartofwhatiwantcough* so i should be with someone who isn’t going anywhere. end up doing a 2 – 3 year engagement depending on when the question is popped, end up married by the age 29 – 30. holy shit im so close to bein old. seems a bit much… nah, i know what i want. i’ll have someone who wants the same.

- family planning. yep… i want a lil boy dammit ! so in the next few years, if all of the above is goin as it should. imma get me one.

- loose ties with anyone, will be cut. i’m already doing that. no idle emotions, and i’m too grown for crushes.

- loose ties with family will be tightened. oh, some WILL be cut too, because they just cant get right.

- me bein the person i am, i care too damn much and it really is hard not to. hopefully by then, it will be nipped in the bud.

i dont really need or want much more, don’t know what else to add. i just need to put some shit in motion. some times we’re so worried about the wrong thigs, that the right ones get overlooked.

oh yeah, i was told by a medical professional, that i need to destress. alrighty then.

hope you know what that means. starting today…idgaf !

my movie experience, was horrible. sooo won’t get into that. whatever. i’ll have to watch that on my own since i was so bullshittedly distracted and couldn’t enjoy it. womp.

my week has just ultimately sucked major bawlsackage.
what a life.

he lowkey said my life is crazy. i said his is no walk in the park either.

him: you are life
me: is that right
him: yeah
him: i won’t stress it again

werd.
;]

don’t think i just forgot how we argued like an old married couple today either.

he acted like an asshole, so i got bitchy. he gets pissy, i flip out, he ignores me ALL day. he knows i hate that shit. i lay a “truth trip” on him, (yeah, cause it wasn’t no guilt shit, just realness) and leave it be.

“i don’t care”. liar… don’t i know you better than that.

came around tonight just in time, because as i said, my night sucked.

him: i guess
him: but ur annoyed
me: nah, i think im just miserable
him: yeah
him: u are
me: well, fix it.
him: how?
me: idk
me: make me happy.
him: how can I?
me: the best way you can
me: tell me a joke

*insert comic relief here*

few minutes later, i hear that ringtone, and see his face all on the G1 screen…

i answer…

(wtf… are we playin the same song, damn near same part and everything.
point number 3 billion 1 on the soul mate chart, but eh… who’s counting)

of course, the intro of random bullshittery that is him, followed by the lecture i KNEW was comin’ in response to all the crap i said to him earlier.

i wouldn’t be so confused, if you weren’t so damn confused.
as moms would say “yall better get it together”

yall ain’t ready.

i kinda lied to him tonight though. eh, he knows i can’t stop doing certain things. okay, well yeah…i can stop. doesn’t mean i won’t think about it. i can’t help it. i know what i want, i guess i just want it now. besides, if i stopped, he’d think something was wrong lol.

i shall “stop questioning shit”, as long as he does the same.

back to my “nonplan”.

hi, i’m nesa. you must not know what that means. ;]
check the evidence…

oh yeah, let the countdown begin.
hells yeah…

i’ll be back with a plan that follows the “nonplan”.