After having a random convo about how “men are stupid” earlier today with a friend of mine, she happened to stumble across a poem. I won’t go into detail about it, i’ll just link and post it so you can read it on your own. This poem kind of made me feel some type of way, so I wrote a poem responding to it. so here goes.

his…

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The Masculine Wild

damnit
I want to be the emotional one sometimes
Throwing dishes across the room when I am angry
Withholding sex as a form of protest

I want my emotionally starved ego fed and stroked during grey’s anatomy
I want you to stop everything
In the middle of general hospital
Just to hear about my day
I am going to do ass backward shit
Like tell you to go ahead
When I really want you to stay
Hang up the phone on you
Then become upset when you do not call me back

Matter of fact
I am going to claim that you do not care for me
Regardless of all the shit that you do for me
Because your love
does not look like the love I read about in cheesy romance novels

I shouldn’t have to tell you why I am upset
Because somehow you should already know why
After all
it is your fault that I am upset anyway

I am going to tell you all my problems
But I do not want you to make any suggestions about how to solve them
In fact
I will be upset if you try to

And when you are having a bad day
I am going to assume
it has something to do with me
Because I am just that fucking vain

And when it is all over
I am going to blame our misfortunes on you
Regardless of all the shit I may have done

And the next one that comes along
Will be held accountable for all the things
I believe you have done wrong
And my heart shall stay hidden behind this impenetrable wall….

and mine…

The Feminine Wild

Well damn…
Maybe I want to be the one who seems to take everything on the chin
Walking off instead of talking it out
I can withhold sex too, and turn around and tell you how I can get it from someone else on top of that

I want you to walk on eggshells and stroke my ego so that I never feel less than a man
I want you to vanish when the game comes on
Well, that’s unless you’re catering to me like a waitress at hooters
I’m gonna tell you one thing when I mean the other
Tell you I don’t give a shit
When I do really care
Always tell you to call me
Then when you do, I don’t pick up the phone

You know what…
Imma accuse you of all the things I’m afraid you might do
Even though I know you’re not, and never will
Just because I’m insecure
And because I’ve done it myself and I’m afraid karma’s gonna bite me in the ass

I don’t have to tell you why I’m angry
I’m a man
I can deal with it on my own

I won’t even bother to tell you my problems
Just keep them all inside
And even if I do, I don’t need your help
I’m a man, I can handle my own

And when you’re having a bad day
Imma just think “here we go again”
Blame it on that time of the month
Because I’m that fucking ignorant

Then when its all said and done
I’m gonna blame everything on you being “crazy” or “over emotional”
Regardless of how bottled up or inconsiderate I may have been

And when someone else steps in the picture
Every little quirk is gonna make me say “you’re just like rest”
And find some other reason to run away
Just because I want to live with my guard up…

Okay, I’m back.

No, seriously people… I am.

With my handy dandy laptop, and the power of unlimited wireless internet, I vow to blog whenever and where ever possible just to keep my site updated, and to maintain my sanity.

As far as the layout updates, eh… I’m kinda not into all the designing and coding anymore. I’m not sure if its just because I haven’t done it in so long, or if I really just don’t remember how to do it. Womp.

So yeah, I’m finished with this whole school thing. (for now anyway). Externship and everything, is complete. I am now a medical assistant without a job

That’s nobody’s fault but my own though, because after being so busy to the point of insanity for the past, what… 9 months? I’ve really just needed a breather. I have been taking care of some business and really just doing nothing when I get the chance. I have redone my resume, made some online profiles, and I have filled out a few applications. It’s only been about two weeks, so before anybody jumps on my case, I haven’t just graduated and said screw it.

I have been slippin’ though. The place where I did my externship at was awesome. Everyone loves me, I got to know the office procedures backwards, forwards, and upside down. I’ve been back to visit, and the place has started to fall apart since I left. Not solely based on my absence, but because the other extern quit, (she wasn’t doing much anyway…but w/e) someone’s mom died, so they’ve been out the office, another MA is leaving because he got another job, and Rita is gonna be leaving within a few months for maternity leave. They haven’t been able to do blood draws because they don’t have enough people to have someone in the lab. That was my main job after a while because I loved to do it. I did fill out an application to get into the resource pool so that I could come in and work for them even if it was just temporary, but I haven’t followed up on it. That’s damn near a guaranteed spot since I wouldn’t even have to be trained or go through an orientation. Now that, I can be yelled at for, because its just ignorant on my part. I think I’ll give human resources a call when I get done with this.

Eh, I’m still single but I am actually fine with that. Messiah is still my default stand in when I need somebody to watch a movie or go out with. Within the span of a few weeks though, damn near all of my exes have flooded in out of nowhere trying to take me out, spend some time, or talk to me again. It must be that time of the year. I’m good on that. I tried to give one of them a chance, but he smokes too much weed, and I swear his attitude is thee worst. I don’t care how cute, or how much history we have, dealing with a high ass, whining ass, grown man who complains and curses too much is so not for me.

There is someone I do have my eye on though. I’ve had my eye on him since I was introduced to him so many months ago. I won’t even get into that, that is for a whole different entry…

Imma go try to do something productive now.

Ciao.