When you want someone more than you need air to breathe
Like when you want to express this ball of emotion within
But it gets stuck in the back of your throat when you try to speak
Then you choke on your own feelings
Why not just swallow your pride?

Words fail us

When the way we feel does not reflect our actions
Like when you are on the edge of not giving a damn, yet stick it out
I wanna say “im tired” “I cant do this”, yet I’m still there
I think maybe you’d make it easier if I speak up
Yet, words fail and I suck it up hoping you’d realize it and just change

Words fail us

When we do get the nerve up to say something
Then end up having to say it over and over again
And nothing seems to change in the end
And we want to just give the hell up, yet we keep talking
And our words just fall on deaf ears

Words fail us

When I try to write how I feel
And I end up with this…
And this is nowhere near how I feel…
I cant portray it…
Can’t get it out…

Words fail us

When I get frustrated as hell
walk away from my own blog and so called poem
Cuz words just fucking fail me.

Good night. Smh.

Life just wont let me live
Always wanna take when I don’t have shit to give
Gotta admit, life is fuckin corny
Waking up some days like “this shit aint for me”
Starting to ask why, but why the hell not
But am I not tired of givin it all I got?
On my day off I’m wishin I was workin
No time for idle thoughts, no soul searchin
Just can’t win no matter how I try to play it
So much shit to say yet I don’t know how to say it
Feels really good when you really don’t care
You can think that shit but your heart will take it there
Cant have friends, females always try to outdo me
Cant date these niggas because they only wanna screw me
Try to be helpful, but people take advantage
Do you not see that I can barely manage?
Think you hustled me, you really hustled my kid
“I didn’t get new stuff”, well I bet he did
Niggas always say borrow like they gon give shit back
Kindness is weakness, that’s a known fact
Why a bitch gotta do me dirty all for a piece of dick?
Come at me on some bullshit thinking she slick
But its them slime ball bitches that niggas go for
Act like a slut, the niggas will love you more !
I’m on some real shit, chill shit, the type you make your wife
But those the type of females a nigga DON’T want in his life
Niggas are ass backwards in their ways of thinkin
You can tell them real shit but it just wont sink in
You can say it verbally, poetically, shit, put it in an e-mail
To some people you’re gonna be “just another female”
I look back at shit and damn, love just don’t love me
nobody gonna say this is how its supposed to be
Am I complainin? Hells yeah im complainin
Give my fuckin all and what am I gainin?
I have the right to do so, can’t tell me I don’t
Imma get it because I deserve it, cant tell me I wont.
These other bitches complain, bitch for WHAT?
Nobody want you for a “wife” when you a lowkey slut
These heartbreaker ass females takin niggas down a notch
Shatter him all to pieces and then just watch
When I try to love him I gotta mend his heart
But this wall he got up is gonna tear us apart
These hot and cold ass brawds who fall in love every minute
Make it hard for real females who emotions are really in it
They quick to pass out, hand out, or give up the ass
Guess that’s why good girls like me will always finish last
Aint no way to do special shit anymore
Anything you try to do, has been done a billion times before
Females come, females go, won’t be no time for me
Irreplaceable? Nope, you better tell em B
Put a lot of time and heart into shit
Its like I get in the ring just to take another hit
Thought I knew what love was, but I really didn’t know
Took the love of one person to really help it grow
Took the love of another to really push it to the limit
I know they both love me, but neither are really in it
Not the right time, the right place, or the right thing
Gotta appreciate it for what it is for the time being
“when a good girl’s gone bad…” well y’all know the rest.
Nah not me, I look a life like a test
This shit is a crash course, not the final exam
Everything I’m not, makes me everything I am
To care a lot more, you gotta care a lil less
Gotta know that through it all “nesa you da bess !”
Life can throw a bow, knock ya teeth out, shit imma still be smilin
Hang with the boys on the weekend, “yo cousin, you wiiiiiilll’n” !
Have a few drinks while they spark up an L
Stop fuckin thinking so much and just in & exhale
I’m grateful for what I got and the people I get it from
So uh, right now I want you to give the drummer some

No ma really, give the drummer some !

Can’t touch the untouchable, break the unbreakable
Shake the unshakeable …
it’s nesie baby !
(repeats and two steps)

A little irrational at times, I may get beside myself, but I’m still the best thing since sliced bread, nigga.
Get chu a loaf !

You look so sad, what’s got you down and out? Lips so sweet, they should be use to smile, not pout.

Eyes tell the story of hardships and madness. On your adorably cute cheeks I see dried tears of sadness.

Upon your bosom, bears a wealth of sorrow. Yesterday’s nightmares washed away your dreams of tomorrow.

That arch in your back made for you to walk with a graceful stride. So why do you not walk with your head held high?

Labored breathing because you never get to let out a sigh of relief. Why is it that you take upon yourself so much grief?

Mental stability is as thin as thread, from all the many thoughts constantly racing through your head.

You seem so exhausted and your aura has no shine. You’ve lost all hope and you have no idea what your soul is searching to find.

But if you pay close attention you can feel the rhythm of your pulse. You’re still alive and kicking and that’s what should matter to you most.

A repeatedly broken heart keeps on mending and beating strong. So dust off your shoulders, take it on the chin and keep pressing on.

Through all of that tough exterior I see an absolutely vibrant spirit. This may have caught you off guard but I thought you ought to hear it.

That’s why I had to stop and say, “excuse me, miss.” But didn’t you know you are way too beautiful to be stressing like this?

his…

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The Masculine Wild

damnit
I want to be the emotional one sometimes
Throwing dishes across the room when I am angry
Withholding sex as a form of protest

I want my emotionally starved ego fed and stroked during grey’s anatomy
I want you to stop everything
In the middle of general hospital
Just to hear about my day
I am going to do ass backward shit
Like tell you to go ahead
When I really want you to stay
Hang up the phone on you
Then become upset when you do not call me back

Matter of fact
I am going to claim that you do not care for me
Regardless of all the shit that you do for me
Because your love
does not look like the love I read about in cheesy romance novels

I shouldn’t have to tell you why I am upset
Because somehow you should already know why
After all
it is your fault that I am upset anyway

I am going to tell you all my problems
But I do not want you to make any suggestions about how to solve them
In fact
I will be upset if you try to

And when you are having a bad day
I am going to assume
it has something to do with me
Because I am just that fucking vain

And when it is all over
I am going to blame our misfortunes on you
Regardless of all the shit I may have done

And the next one that comes along
Will be held accountable for all the things
I believe you have done wrong
And my heart shall stay hidden behind this impenetrable wall….

and mine…

The Feminine Wild

Well damn…
Maybe I want to be the one who seems to take everything on the chin
Walking off instead of talking it out
I can withhold sex too, and turn around and tell you how I can get it from someone else on top of that

I want you to walk on eggshells and stroke my ego so that I never feel less than a man
I want you to vanish when the game comes on
Well, that’s unless you’re catering to me like a waitress at hooters
I’m gonna tell you one thing when I mean the other
Tell you I don’t give a shit
When I do really care
Always tell you to call me
Then when you do, I don’t pick up the phone

You know what…
Imma accuse you of all the things I’m afraid you might do
Even though I know you’re not, and never will
Just because I’m insecure
And because I’ve done it myself and I’m afraid karma’s gonna bite me in the ass

I don’t have to tell you why I’m angry
I’m a man
I can deal with it on my own

I won’t even bother to tell you my problems
Just keep them all inside
And even if I do, I don’t need your help
I’m a man, I can handle my own

And when you’re having a bad day
Imma just think “here we go again”
Blame it on that time of the month
Because I’m that fucking ignorant

Then when its all said and done
I’m gonna blame everything on you being “crazy” or “over emotional”
Regardless of how bottled up or inconsiderate I may have been

And when someone else steps in the picture
Every little quirk is gonna make me say “you’re just like rest”
And find some other reason to run away
Just because I want to live with my guard up…